Wednesday, March 8, 2017

Amy's 5 star Review of Love Me More by RS Medina

I’ve always heard that you should marry someone that loves you more than you love them – that if you do this, you’ll always be happy.
Did I follow that advice? No. Am I happy? No. And is Finn happy? No. 
I’m stuck in a marriage with an ex-Marine suffering from PTSD. I’m not sure we’re in love anymore. We have a baby who brings us both joy—but it’s not enough. I feel like my life is crumbling around me and I’m struggling to keep the pieces together. 
Someone from my past has sauntered back in quietly, unknowingly. To my surprise, the attention is what I was craving.
I have to make a decision. Do I stay and fight, or leave, when the idea of escape is beautiful and tempting?
I’m always the one who loves more.

5 stars

I want to preface this with saying that I am married to a solider that has PTSD. He served 21 years in Special Ops and went places that I didn't even want to know about; did things I couldn't even wrap my brain around and saw his friends die; not only die but their bodies torn apart. So this book is something that shouldn't be being rated as a one star read. I don't understand those ratings except to say that maybe you haven't experienced someone losing themselves to the country we so gratefully live in. And if you haven't experienced this, then you should consider yourself very lucky. 

Finn is not the man that Blaire married. She always knew he wanted to be a Marine but she never knew how it would take the man she loved. He once made her feel she was the most beautiful woman in the world. He looked at her like she was the only one and their love created Olivia. Finn adores his daughter. He lives and breathes her. But their marriage, the team that they once were is gone. How can you continue to love someone who doesn't give the love in return. How do you continue to survive yourself. 

Finn wears his scarred and worn face well. He won't forget the things he saw or did or his tours. Each one changed him; leaving him hardened and empty. Three tours and out. They didn't want him back. Evaluated, diagnosed with PTSD and trying to transition into civilian life. They don't help you. Depression, anger, hurt .. admitting you have those things is weakness and a Marine is not weak. No one will give him a job. No one wants a damaged soldier except for maybe some fast food joints for minimum wage. Failure ... 

The characters in this story are so well written I could see it in my head. A wife craving the attention and love that never comes from her husband -- an unexpected old flame giving her what she needs. A man who has no soul left; a soul left in the desert with his brothers. A child caught in between and a old lover who should have never stepped through that door. 

RS Medina has written a story for us but yet its so true to life. Every part of Finn and what happens to him is true .. every part of the wife left wishing and feeling helpless .. true. Absolutely incredible. As a reader and a advocate for soldiers with PTSD; their families and their transitions this story needed to be told. I am so proud of the writing, the characters, the depiction of life during and after the military is spot on. No one wants to hire lifetime soldiers because they are "afraid" they might have an episode or they offer them "cart duty" outside or they offer them nothing at all. Life at home is the same. Anything can trigger a flashback, emotions are dealt with in ways that aren't the best for the entire family and then those family members suffer. Its truly a disease and an incredible hardship for everyone. 

So again I say thank you. Thank you for your bravery in sharing this story. Thank you from those of us that sit and hope that the world knows what these men and women are giving up for the freedoms we have. I thank you for the families that work to save the lives of their lives when they come home from unknown places. I thank you for shedding light onto a hush hush subject. I also encourage anyone who is suffering to reach out. You are not alone. Do not suffer in silence. Do not take yourself out of this world. HELP make the world understand what you need. We will be there. I will be there. 

Standing ovation -- and again those who gave this book a one star rating. Please go talk to some veterans, volunteer and then read this book again. Please ... 

WARNING: This book contains a story around a serious disease PTSD. If you have triggers I caution you. This does NOT have a HEA by any means but if you can do it .. read it. Buy it .. keep it and share it. 

Thank you for the chance to read. I am honored. Review to post to Ramblings From Beneath The Sheets.

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